Introducing... Layce Gardner

I'm not big on the lesbian romance genre. (I can't believe I can say that with a straight face, considering I am currently dabbling in that genre, but anyway.)

I guess it's because my early forays into it were a little sub-par. The characters were all a little too beat up, and some of the plot points bordered too far on the unbelievable side of the fence for me.

I get it. We've all been through our Coming Out period, our Lusting After our Straight Best Friend period and our U-Haul Lesbian period (in Australia we call it the Budget Lesbian period) among others. Most of us want to read about that stuff to make us feel better about bad decisions, bad romances, and to escape from our bad, sad lives.

Here's the thing. I'm more than the sum of my bad and sad parts. I have lots of happy times. "Why doesn't anyone write about the happy times?" I lamented. "Why doesn't anyone write something fun?"

Then I found Layce Gardner. I am proud to be able to call her my Facebook Friend. (Which means that she stupidly accepted my friend request even though she didn't know me from a bar of soap, and now I can stalk her interact with her whenever I want.)

I can't remember exactly how I discovered her novel Tats, but I devoured it in two sittings. I would have devoured it in one, but a pesky little thing called my day job came between us.

I passed my paperback copy on to a great friend of mine, along with rave reviews. (Lisa, I still want it back!)
 
I loved the book so much, in fact, that as soon as the next book Tats Too came out, I downloaded it onto my kindle as soon as it was available. This time, I got to read it while I was on holiday in Fiji - I wasn't going to let a little thing like a friend's wedding get in the way of me and that book.

I read parts of it out to my wife, giggling like an idiot, while my wife just looked at me knowing full well I AM an idiot. "I guess you have to read what happened before" was my answer to her blank looks. 

Anyway, to the point. 

I downloaded and read Penny Nickels and Wild at Heart as soon as they came out too, and was itching for more.

That was a few months ago now, and I had decided that I wasn't going to go out of my way to buy any new books until I had finished some of my own. 

Then, I saw this pop up on my facebook feed:

I was so excited that the new book was available, but you know, my no-book-buying thing.

I held off for exactly three days. 

I bought it, promising that I would only read the first chapter after I had at least completed my word-count quota for the day. 

I only lasted a couple of hours before I thought "I'll just read the first paragraph and see if it grabs me." 


A couple of hours of reading and laughing out loud later, I realised that it was past midnight, and that I had wanted to get to bed early, so I could get up early and get in some pre-caffeinated writing time. (For non-writers, that's the best time to trick my muse into giving up some of her secrets - before she wakes up and goes MIA).

I don't really have the whole "do something good, reward yourself" thing down very well.

So the truth of it is, I don't think I can hold out on reading the rest of the book. I think I might just take an early weekend and go ahead and get it over and done with.


If you're curious, my favourite part of the book so far is when the girls (Dana and Trudy) are sharing an unlit cigarette. They both take pretend puffs and then Trudy takes the cigarette back and "ashes" on the floor.

No wait. It's when Dana meets Ellen. "She had brown-almost-black eyes like melted chocolate and a smile that reminded Dana of strawberry cheesecake. Her smile itself didn't exactly remind Dana of cheesecake; it's that the smile gave her the same feeling as looking at a slice of strawberry cheesecake."

No, it's the conversation about Dana's need to fill a hole in a conversation. "See, when there's a hole in the conversation I feel this urge to stick something in the hole. In fact, there's very few people in this world I'm comfortable being around and not sticking something in their hole."

Layce, you had me at "'My girlfriend is a slut,' Dana Dooley said." It's going to be another late night.

You can find Layce's books on Amazon here
Check out her blog here

What non-writers need to know about writers

This post is going out to all my non-writer friends and family, and is a (mostly) tongue-in-cheek list of things you should know about writers. There is a grain of truth to all of them, and of course, this list is incomplete, only because it's based on my experiences as a writer, and not writers in general.


1. Any conversation you have with us, or event that you share with us, may be used in a story at any time in the future. Of course, names will be changed to protect the guilty, and it will be embellished to within an inch of its life.

2. We may have based a character on you, but it't not the one you think. And no, we won't tell you which one it is.

3. When you ask us how our book is going, and we reply with "which one?" we are only half joking. We flit between WIPs like an ADD kid on a sugar high.

4. Our writing time is precious. It comes in a close second to procrastinating on the internet researching.

5. Theoretically, it takes next to no time to write a book, based on words per hour. It's finding the right words that take up all of our time.

6. The three essential food groups for a writer are caffeine, alcohol and sugar. Sometimes all at once.

7. We will meticulously set up our study/writing space, only to end up writing on the laptop on the lounge, or spread our paperwork out on the dining table. Creativity cannot be restrained.

8. The only time we're happy to do the housework is when we're on a deadline with a book.

9. We will take notes anywhere and everywhere - on napkins, receipts, popcorn containers and on our hands when necessary. It is quite normal for us to wake at 3am, write a few lines, and go back to sleep like nothing ever happened.

10. We are always writing, even when we're taking part in an activity that looks like it has nothing to do with our work. Staring in to space is plotting, and watching TV or a movie is research.

And a bonus:

11. We love social media. Writing is most often a solitary pursuit, so we use facebook, twitter and whatever new sites and apps are available to keep in touch with the "real world". Having said that, if you see us pop up too often, ask us sternly "Why aren't you writing?"



Have I missed anything? Feel free to add to my list in the comments.

What Pad?

Wattpad is one of my most recent online discoveries when I was procrastinating researching ways to find an audience. 

I’m an unknown author, and in this new world of Anyone Can Publish, being unknown is a huge problem. What’s also a problem is building an audience for your books from scratch. I’ve read a lot of authors who are very active on a LOT of sites and forums that have subject matter similar to their book themes, but I think this really only works with particular genres. Sci-fi is one that comes to mind as is Steampunk.  

I’m not active on those types of sites, and I don’t have the time or inclination to be active on them either. Though I am working on a steampunk idea and I love the fiction genre, I’m not into the steampunk movement, where people don costumes and assume characters and build their own weapons etc. I’m fascinated by it of course, and I love seeing some of the innovations and ideas people come up with, but apart from using those things as research and inspiration, I don’t go much past that. 

I’m on twitter, but not as active as what I probably could be. I have a facebook page, but it’s my personal space. I do have an author page I set up about a year ago, but I haven’t made it public, and I’m not sure if I will or not. I also have this blog, which I am terrible at keeping a regular schedule for. I want to get better at that, but at the moment, writing fiction is taking precedent. 

I also read a lot of writing blogs and author blogs and a lot of them have articles on what they’ve done to build their audiences and buzz for their books. I know that works for someone else may not necessarily work for me, but I think I have managed to work out how I want to go about getting my books out into the world and earning their keep.

That’s where Wattpad comes in.

Wattpad allows writers/authors of all levels to provide free content to millions of readers around the world. Stories of any length and genre are uploaded in short chunks (chapters or scenes), and readers get the chance to vote for their favourites and make comments on the work. The thing I like is that it gives authors the chance to interact directly with their readership, which is much more personal than a blog.

Some articles I’ve read have worried that if you provide your content for free on a site like Wattpad, readers will become accustomed to free content and not want to pay, but a lot of authors who have used the site share a different experience. In fact, I’ve only just signed up to Wattpad, and added a few stories to my reading shelf, but have already downloaded (paid for) one author’s books from kindle after reading the first in the series or free. I could have just read all his stories on Wattpad for free, but I was so excited by his work I downloaded the next two stories he’d written in the series to my kindle straight away.

I’ve also commented on a few of the chapters for other writers, and have started to make some connections. I imagine they will grow when I put my own work up on the site.

Which brings me to some news. My birthday is at the end of this month, and the blog turns two in a couple of weeks. I’ve been writing for a long time, and finally have a few things written (90% or so ready to go to beta readers) that I’m happy with and think would be perfect to try out on Wattpad.

This Sunday (March 31st), I’ll be posting the first chapter of one of my short novels (still a work in progress) on the Wattpad site. You can read the first chapter of it (and any other stories posted on there) without signing up. If you want to read more though and vote and make comments (which I hope you do), you’ll need to sign up for a free account.

The thing I really like about the way Wattpad works is that on top of the website, they have android and iMachine apps, so you can keep up to date and read on the go, or while waiting for an appointment. Each chunk is designed to be read quickly, so you don’t need to invest a lot of time in one go to read a story.

Best of all, they’re free, and you get the chance to discover new authors, and try out new genres, without having to invest any of your hard-earned.

I’ll post the link to the first chapter upload on facebook, twitter and here on the blog. Feel free to pass the link on to anyone you think might enjoy it.

 

In the mean time, you can connect with me on Wattpad here.

 

 

 

Lesbian does not always equal sex

(Admit it. All you saw in the heading was "lesbian sex").

Now that I've got your attention, I wanted to chat about a couple of things that have been annoying me no end the last few weeks. I've been doing some research on an idea I have for some steampunky type characters and plots, and having some real fun checking out some of the steampunk websites around the place. (Check these cool gadgets out)

The first one I seem to be encountering whenever I search for lesbian steampunk. There doesn't appear to be too much around, which is great for me in a way, because I can tap into a fresh market. But I've stumbled across a few forums where other people have been asking for recommendations for some lesian steampunk, and the answers have almost always been to the tune of "I don't have anything to recommend for lesbian steampunk, but here's some cool erotica that you might like instead."

Now, I'm not big on the erotica genre anyway, but why is it always assumed that if you're looking for any type of fiction with lesbian characters (or gay for that matter), that you're automatically after erotica?

Here's a tip: I'm JUST after lesbian characters. I'm squeamish about badly written sex scenes, be they same-same or otherwise. Hell, I'm squeamish about sex scenes, badly written or not. I like to use my own imagination for those types of scenes, and much prefer the "fade out" effect. I'd rather not have a blow-by-blow of who puts what, where.

What I'm really looking for is this: steampunk stories, that don't have sex as the end goal, with lesbian characters. Simple? Apparently not.

The second thing I'm frustrated with is the amount of gratuitous sex in a lot of the lesbian books I'm reading. (I have a whole other post whinging about other stuff I don't like about lesbian fiction, but I'm sticking with the sex for this one).

I was reading a sample of one a couple of weeks ago (a sample, which is only the first 10%), and the lead character stops what she's doing to jump in the sack with some hussy she just met, within the first five pages. THE FIRST FIVE PAGES!! Give me a break. That is not characterisation. That is gratuitous sex. Not even James Bond jumps into bed with the women plotting his downfall in the first five pages (or the first five minutes in the case of the movies).

I get it. We have this image to protect where BBLs (Big Butch Lesbians) can bed anyone they want without consequence, and that makes them super cool. Women, straight and gay, fall at their feet and worship the ground they walk on.

I don't want to read about those characters.

Here's what I want.

I want characters who go through shit that doesn't happen just because they're lesbian. I want characters whose major trait is something OTHER than the fact that they're lesbian.

So the question is, how do I find those characters?

The answer: in my own head. My answer to my frustrations is to write what I want to read, since no-one else seems to be doing it.

Coping with change and my Big News

This change I can deal with.
Image courtesy of Rebecca Barray WANA Commons

I'm no longer big on change. I say "no longer" because I used to be all for it.

Years ago, when a club I was involved with debated whether to cut ties with our existing sports club or go in a new direction with a new sports club, I voted for change. I was all for a new start and a chance to build something new and exciting from the ground up. In hindsight, we should have looked better before we leapt, but that's a whole other story.

Back to my point.

I now like being comfortable. I like the familiar. It's easy. It's known. It's not scary. It's safe.

When something happens to change that?

I worry. I panic. I get agitated and angry. I've also been known to swear. Or, in the case of TV shows, stop watching altogether. ("They've changed time slots again?? I'm just not going to watch any more. That will show them!" Sidenote - I really do miss Bones and Greys. Sigh.)

Sometimes, change can be sudden and unexpected.

Like last night, when we went to do our grocery shopping, we realised the shop was changing its layout. I could tell something was up as soon as I could see the toilet paper at the top end of the last aisle - it's usually at the bottom end. (Ha ha! I didn't know I'd made that joke until I was retyping this post.)

I was immediately on my guard. Lo and behold, the softdrinks were no longer with the chips, but with the condiments and sauces (WTF?) Thankfully, they'd left the chocolate in the same aisle as it had always been. I guess someone in management was smart enough not to change that aisle around.

After some bitching and whinging, my wife slapped me and told me to get a grip. No, not really, but I did get over it. The aisles that were finished didn't look so cluttered and apart from having to search for a few things, the shopping trip was still relatively painless.

Some change though, is a slow burn of acceptance.

Which brings me (finally) to my Big News.

Short version: Wifey has a new job based in another town and we're moving. (Saying that fast is like ripping off a bandaid and makes it seem easier than it is.)

Long Version: "The Plan" has always been for me to give up work and focus on my writing "at some time in the future."

That future is fast approaching.

It's exciting and scary and OMGWTF! all at once.

We've been planning this move since this time last year when Wifey landed the job temporarily. We discussed the possibility that it could become permanent which would mean a move to a small town further west.

At first I was like "no way", but after many long nights of drinking discussion I realised what a great opportunity it is for us both career-wise.

Wifey gets the opportunity to take a higher position doing something she loves, and I finally get the opportunity to stop working for someone else and start really working on getting myself published.

What did we do to celebrate the fact that we'd be dropping to one wage? We went out and bought an investment property. Yay! (Face palm.)

Leaving aside that financial decision (it will be better for us long term, I promise Wifey!), the road to acceptance has been a long one.

The thing is, I never actually thought I'd be able to take time off of my real job to concentrate on my writing. It was always on my wish-list but never, until now, attainable.

So when the opportunity arose, I railed against it. (You did what?) I actually started talking myself out of my dream of becoming a published author, able to live off the money I make from my writing.

Stupid really, but I was scared. Scared of failing, scared of writing crap, scared of letting down everyone who supports me (even though I know they think I'm crazy). Scared of letting go of a great job with great people that brings in safe money so that we can live a luxurious comfortable life filled with holidays and shopping and paying off our mortgage.

As with all change, there's a transition period. Right now we're in the "Holy shit we need to finish renovating the house so someone will pay us enough money to pay out the mortgage and let us get a new car" phase.

After that will come the "I can't believe no-one will buy our house for a gazillion dollars, it's so worth it" phase, immediately followed by "We'll never have another first house, ever!" phase.

Then there's the "I NEVER want to move again" phase as we unpack and set up a new house in a new town where we know only the people Wifey works for.

But after ALL of that, will be the (hopefully) very long phase of "S R Silcox, full-time author."

I'll be sure to let you know how that goes.

What I learnt about writing from my dogs

When Wifey and I decided to get our first dog, we knew we wanted to adopt one from our local RSPCA.

There's no doubt it's a huge choice and we even used their website survey to work out what breed would be best for us (a beagle, which is exactly the opposite of what we got). Then we hit their website and trolled through the photos, oohing and aahing over the online profiles.

We spent a few weekends going in to the kennels, walking past the hopeful adoptees and walking out again, unsure about what we wanted. Everytime I walked out without a dog, it broke my heart to think that there were so many in there looking for new homes - a home that we didn't think we could give.

We continued this for weeks - me checking the website, emailing profiles to Wifey with "Could this be our Lola?" (the name Wifey was determined to call our dog, so we were predestined to get a girl).

During this time, a little 5 month old kelpie-cross came up. We glossed over her profile for weeks - she was gorgeous, but we figured we preferred a more sedate type of dog. Kelpies are working dogs, and notoriously hyperactive.

We came close with a golden retriever called Magic, but when we took him for a walk he was more interested in being out in the park than he was in us. We also found out that he was a master of escaping yards. Thankfully though, he found a home with a family with kids, which was perfect for him.

Finally, after a few months of looking, I opened up the little kelpie's profile, and had a really good look at her picture. She was a tiny, skinny little thing, and jet black. Her tongue lolled out the side of her mouth and her ears pointed straight up and alert. 

I suggested to Wifey that we might get her out for a walk when we went back to the RSPCA that weekend. Wifey agreed, because it was the one profile she kept coming back to as well. What could it hurt?

That weekend, we walked straight up to her kennel and spoke to her. I can't remember what we said, but Wifey probably said something like "Do you want to come home with us?" We should have known right then that she was the one - she leapt at the wall and flipped off it. Wifey and I stepped back and said "whoa!" We knew we might have an excitable puppy on our hands. We also wondered what she'd be able to do off our six-foot fence.

Undeterred by her acrobatic abilities, we asked a volunteer if we could take her out to have a play with her. When we first stepped into the yard, the volunteer took off the leash, and I knelt down to the kelpie's level. She walked straight over to me and put her head under my armpit, resting her chin on my leg.

I looked up at Wifey and smiled. This kelpie was the one. We played with her for awhile, but in all honesty, we didn't need to make our minds up - she'd picked us, so we figured we better just formalise the adoption and take her home.

While we were there playing with her, we had a few of the volunteers and staff come up and say how happy they were that this little kelpie had found a home at last. She'd been in the kennels for nearly three months, and no-one had shown much interest. They all fussed over her and said she was a beautiful dog.

We can certainly attest to that.

So, after signing the paperwork and paying the adoption fee, Daisy became the first addition to our family.

Wifey and Daisy the day we brought her home

I always say that Daisy chose us, rather than the other way around.

I'd like to think that she waited until we came along to show us her best side so that we would be the ones to take her home.

So, what does this have to do with writing?

Early on when my writing was just a hobby, I wanted to reach the world. I wanted 'everyone' to read and love my work.

Since then, I've realised that not everyone's going to like what I write, and that's ok.

My job is to be my best self. To write what I'm passionate about. To write in my own unique way.

Sure, lots of people might come and have a look, but they'll keep smiling and walk right by, knowing my stuff just isn't for them. But just like Daisy, if I'm true to myself and write what I love, the right people will come along.


We always knew we wanted two dogs, because we didn't want to have a lonely dog on our hands, since both of us work full time. Our other dog, Ruby, is a rescue pet from the same RSPCA we got Daisy from.




Rubes (front) and Daisy tuckered out after a tough day

I'll tell Ruby's story in a future post, because she taught me things only a Labrador could.

And if you're after a dog, cat, rat, chook, or other type of pet please consider your local RSPCA or shelter.

Fifty Shades of Grey - Is It Black & White?

I decided pretty early on that I would never do book reviews on my blog. The simple reason is that books, as with any type of art, are subjective. Whether someone likes them or not depends more on taste rather than the skill of the author.

Also, I’m a writer myself, and I don’t want to come down on other writers in any way since I know how hard it is to finish even the shortest of stories. For that reason, I had decided to stick with the adage “if you can’t find something good to say, don’t say anything at all.”

I also pride myself on not buying books just because they’re trending. Not that grossly popular books are necessarily a bad thing. I like to wait until the hype has died down a bit, check out reviews from what I think are reputable sources, and decide whether I’ll jump in and see what the rest of the world is talking about.

And so it was that last week, when looking for something a little different, I finally relented and decided to see why everyone was making such a fuss about Fifty Shades of Grey. Apart from searching for something to read, I also like to download samples of big sellers to see what they’re doing that I’m not to see if I can learn anything from them.

Anyway, I read some reviews on Amazon for Fifty Shades - a lot of them singing its praises, some of them ho-hum and a lot that were quite scathing. At risk of being unpopular, I’d be in the latter camp.

Since I read most of my books on the kindle now, I took advantage of the sample feature so I could decide whether to plunk down $9 for the full electronic version. I’m pretty glad I did - safe to say, I saved that $9 for a more worthy book.

It’s no real secret that this book (and series) began life as Twilight fan fiction somewhere on the interwebs where people flock to read that stuff for free. It would, after all, be a major copyright headache for people to write about their favourite characters (who they did not create) and make money off them without the original author’s permission. There is a whole other discussion about the ethics and legality of making money from fanfiction on the interwebs as well, but I’ll save that for another post.

Seems there’s not too great a change needed in order to avoid a copyright suit these days. While I also didn’t read any of the Twilight series (at the behest of some good friends, who said not to waste my time), I did get talked into watching the movies. I have no idea whether the movies stayed true to the books or not, but usually the movie versions tend to be more dramatic than the books. If that’s the case with Twilight, I’m glad I didn’t read the series. However, I digress. My thoughts on Twilight are for another post, but my point is I have no idea how much of Fifty Shades (formerly known as “Masters of the Universe”) is similar to the Twilight series.

Anyway, after struggling to get through the sample chapters, I was not happy to go ahead and purchase the full version of Fifty Shades because, for me, the writing was (as Ana would say) “triple crap”.

It came across to me as a fifteen year old writing an erotic fantasy about hooking up with her unattainable crush in the secrecy and safety of her bedroom. Even from the start, the character of Ana seemed naive and not in control of her life.

The dialogue was stilted and overly formal, and the author seemed to have a very limited vocabulary when it came to cursing (crap, double crap, holy cow) and description (lips and eyebrows “quirking up”, Ana biting her lip and rolling her eyes). Apart from that the author is British, and the setting is the US. Nothing usually wrong with that, except that the whole book is really written in British language, despite the American spellings.

Apart from that, the whole thing just didn’t really make sense to me, even in the very little I read of this book. Granted, I never got to read any of the erotic stuff because the sample only ran to two chapters, but I was ready to give up after the first page. The whole scene in chapter two when Christian comes in to the hardware store, where Ana works, to buy rope, cable ties and tape is just a bit weird for me. Having read the reviews and knowing what the whole deal is with the series, I know it’s not a romance, but come on. He just happens to decide that Ana is someone he wants to bring into his seedy world of BDSM after meeting her once?

I must admit though, I was disappointed that the sample ended where it did, and I was tempted for a second to download the full version just to see how bad it got - you know, like seeing a car crash and despite feeling queasy you just can’t tear your eyes away? But I told myself that, in reality, erotic fiction isn’t really my thing anyway, no matter how good it is, so even I would have questioned why I didn't like it in the end.

So, rather than try to discern why it is people are raving about this series so much, I’m going to ask you. If you’ve read Fifty Shades, or Twilight for that matter, what about them made you enjoy them? And if you’ve read both sets of books, are there any major similarities between them? Anything that made you get that de ja vu feeling of having read it before somewhere?

I ask these questions, not to scoff at you for reading tripe, but in order to discern why it's such a phenomenon despite it's short-comings. I am, afterall, still learning my craft, and part of that is finding out what things work in other fiction, and why.

How my Dad taught me about persistence.

Today is the 1 year anniversary of my blog. I started it with a post about my Nanna, and how she inspired me to get off my butt and work hard on my writing. Today, I’m writing a post on someone else who has inspired me, though I don’t think he knows how much.

My dad (and me) at my christening in 1976

I’m a child of the 80’s, so I remember back when video games were literally black and white (in the case of Pong), or green and lighter green (in the case of type-your-instructions RPGs), depending on your game. Game consoles didn’t come with memory cards, so when you turned your game back on, you had to start from the very beginning, every single time.

Like a lot of kids back then, my first game console was a Mattel Intellivision. We got it for Christmas when I was 6 or 7 and I have one very distinct memory from that time.

The day my father set it up was the day he gave me a lesson in persistence.

I didn’t know it then though. I thought it was a lesson in “adults will always play kids games first” and “little kids just have to wait until the big kids finish” or maybe “men just never grow up”.

Anyway, with that first ever game console, Santa brought us 2 games - Tron Deadly Discs and Checkers Draughts.

That first day, while all of us kids were out playing with our other shiny new toys, my dad set up the Intellivision and stuck the Checkers cartridge in to have play. Nothing unusual about that with my dad really, since he usually got to have first play with our toys so he knew how things worked.

Well, my dad played that thing for hours against the computer. I don’t know how many times I went back inside to see if I could have a turn only to see the screen unchanged and dad working out his next move.

You have to remember, this was before the internet and walk-throughs, so when the computer beat you, you had to work out why yourself and then counteract it the next time you played.

I think it may have been dark outside by the time my father triumphed over the computer, and I don’t know how many times he lost against it to get that one win. I just remember how stubborn and determined he was to not let a stupid machine beat him in a simple game like checkers.

Here’s why I think that lesson is important now.

Today, we have so many options to take the easy way out. We have books and websites and apps that tell us how to do things, the way we should live and how to beat games. Lots of people watch the movie but never read the book.

We have instant gratification. We want things, and very often, we get them now. Our attention spans seem to be on the decline. If it’s not interesting right from the start, we discard it. If we buy something second-hand, we only want it after someone else has spent the time restoring it.

I think the challenge is to remember that the things we tend to appreciate the most come to us from hard work and persistence.

Kind of like my writing.

I’ve been at this gig for nearly 13 years now. A lot of people tell me I’m crazy. Sometimes I think I just might be. How can I keep doing something that hasn’t paid me a cent? How can I keep wanting a career in an industry that is so hard to get into, and then stay in?

Because it’s who I am.

I love writing, even during the times I say I hate it. Why? Because occasionally, I read something back and I can see how good I am. I can see how good I am getting after 13 years, and I can see how much better I can become.

Just like my dad, I’m determined to work on what I’m doing wrong so that I can be better. Instead of competing with a computer, I’m competing with myself, and sometimes others, trying to tell me I’ll never be good enough.

Just like my dad, I’m not going to give up because it gets too hard.

Unlike my dad though, and lucky for me, computers now have memory. Everything I ever write can be saved and re-read. So unlike my dad, learning from my mistakes is a little less frustrating.

Gagged by a Chupa Chup - Why I'm Re-branding my Blog

Want to keep me quiet? Get me some of these.

When I was coaching a women's soccer team (eons ago), one of the players (who is still a good friend of mine) gave me a Chupa Chup before the game. I was touched, until she said "It's to give you something to suck on so you shut up while we're playing."

It worked. Anyone who knows me well knows I can get very long-winded, especially when I get onto a topic I love.

I'm passionate about a lot of things, and I probably have an opinion on most things, which makes me a very interesting party guest. Especially if I've had a few beers. But I digress.

Personal Me is currently in discussions with Writer Me about this blogging deal. Truth is, I'm over it, and it's not hard to figure out why. I'm trying to get down to the bottom of who I am in order to distil the "Essence of Me", which is supposed to then allow me to decide what I want to blog about.

In order to build a platform for my writing (as opposed to me), I need to work out my niche (which I've found), and work out who my potential readers are (which I'm working on). I need to post things that would be of interest to them, and not get overly personal, because they want to connect with what I say, rather than me personally.

And they want to know I can write.

Makes perfect sense.

The problem? The stuff that I'm passionate about at this point in time doesn't really over lap with my writing. Which means I feel like I'm splitting myself in two here. Since that's pretty bloody uncomfortable, my two halves are trying to come to a compromise.

Personal Me wants to talk (ok, rant and rave) about gay marriage, politics, sport, beer, you know, all that fun and controversial stuff. A lot of the stuff might not be of interest to my potential readers, but it's interesting to me. And I love writing about that stuff too.

Writer Me wants to talk about books and writing and other fun lesbian stuff. All the stuff that might appeal to my potential readers.

Both Me's love the blogging platform. A big part of why I love writing is that I seem to be able to express myself better in the written word, which then makes me able to express it better to people when I talk about things.

I don't want to come across as some sort of activist or raving looney to potential readers though, because my writing is different to that.

I've tried just posting comments on websites, news sites and other blogs, but the long-winded part of me wants to go on and on and on, until someone shoves a Chupa Chup into my mouth to shut me up.

I feel hamstrung by the restrictions I need to place on myself in order to build my writer platform, and it hurts. I've banned myself from the internet a couple of times until I can come up with a post related to my platform, rather than a rant about something totally unrelated to what I write.

I don't want to hate this platform, because I need it to make Writer Me's work viable. But I don't want to restrict what I talk about because Personal Me takes great pride in being interested in all sorts of stuff.

So here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to re-brand this blog. It's where I'll blog whenever I have something to say and there'll be no restrictions on content. This is where you get the raw, unadulterated me. There may be times when there'll be a crossover because I'll want to talk about a book or movie that will also be of interest to Writer Me.

But mostly, this will be me, straight-up. Well, not straight, but you know what I mean.

Sometimes what I write will interest you, sometimes it won't.

But here's the key. What links everything together is my voice - the way I write stuff. I write like I talk - for the most part - so what you see here is basically what you'd hear if I were talking directly to you. My voice is the rope that keeps Personal Me and Writer Me tethered at the hips.

So, I get to write about whatever the hell I want, with the proviso that I write it in my voice and stop trying to cram myself into a writer box that doesn't go with the colour of my eyes.

I get to kill two birds with one stone - I get to keep Personal Me and Writer Me happy, and hopefully they start to play nice again and let me get the hell on with my writing.

So, without further ado, welcome to the new, improved blog - "The Shit I Know".

Why the change in title? I'll tell you all about that in my next post........



Photo courtesy of Vivian Bedoya

Don't be a Pirate's Wench

Back when you could tell who the real pirates were by their uniforms

I went to Target the other day to buy some new balls for my dogs. As I walked out of the store, a thought occurred to me. I’d just paid five bucks for two small pieces of round rubber that my dogs would more than likely kill by the end of the week. Granted, they did have smiley faces on them, and they were “high bounce” ones, which they love, but still.

That same five dollars could have bought me lunch at one of the many fast-food places in the shopping centre.

It could have bought me two chocolates from the charity box at work, with the added bonus of going to a good cause.

That lazy five bucks could also have bought me five books for my kindle, with a couple of cents change.

Why am I telling you this? Because everything has a value, and value is in the eye of the buyer.

When I want to buy something, I research it. I price-check and compare. If I don’t think it’s worth whatever the asking price is, I don’t buy it. Simple as that really.

Why is digital content any different?

It seems no matter who you talk to, they’ve either downloaded content illegally, or know someone who has. Most times, they often don’t see what the problem is. They might feel a bit “naughty” about it, but that’s it.

Arguments range from “the musicians are rich enough as it is, they’re not missing any money”, to “I wouldn’t have bought it anyway”. Or “I’ve discovered lots of bands/authors by downloading pirated versions of their work, and downloaded the rest of their stuff legally.”

These are excuses. They’re borne from having very little or no connection with the people they hurt. Let’s forget about mega-famous artists like Pink, or Madonna, or Bon Jovi. Let’s also forget about big-name authors like Stephen King, Stephanie Myer and JK Rowling. And let’s forget about Hollywood, Brad Pitt and Steven Spielberg.

Let’s forget about all those famous names for a moment, and think about people like me. Writers whose sole ambition is to publish books for people to read and enjoy. Writers, artists and musicians who work hard for years, even decades, to make enough money to quit their day jobs and work on their passions full-time.

(FYI - only a very minute percentage get to do that)

 

How would they ever be able to contemplate that if people like you don’t see enough value in their hard work to pay 99c for an e-book, $1.69 for a song, or $10 for a movie?

Look, I buy books from the bargain table all the time. I’ve also downloaded a number of free books on the kindle from authors I wouldn’t have discovered otherwise. I get the “value to entertainment ratio”, because on top of being a writer, I’m also a consumer.

The thing is, when you download a pirated version, you take the power away from the creator of that music, book or movie to offer it for free in the first place. It’s rare these days for those of us starting out to not offer something for free. It’s a great marketing ploy. But it’s within our own control to do it.

It’s also well within our rights as artists to expect something in return for our efforts.

You know me. You know what this writing gig means to me. You know how hard I work to make this my full time career. Would you have me working for nothing? Would you have me effectively waste all those years, slogging away at a keyboard, trying to learn my craft in order to produce something I think someone might want to read and enjoy?

Do you value me, and my work, so little that you would choose pirated over paying me a small amount of money in appreciation for my efforts at entertaining you?

All those big names I mentioned earlier? They all started in complete obscurity, working hard until they got that one role, produced that one song, or wrote that one book, that broke them away from the millions of others they were competing against. The money, fame and accolades are fair pay for all their struggles to get to where they are.

There’s no such thing as an over night sensation, but it’s what most of us are working our arses off to achieve.

And those little yellow bouncy balls? They’re still going strong - for now - and they’re giving me, and my dogs, a lot more value than a cheeseburger or a couple of chocolates would have.

Photo by ~Sincere Stock~

Tricking the Muse

Up until recently, I've really been struggling with my writing. I've been concentrating on my "Self-Publish or Die" five-year writing plan and the business side of things, and haven't been working too hard on the actual writing side. Which is stupid really, since I can't publish if I don't write.

My brain has been ticking over with plot-based thoughts, doing random character surveys, and working on settings - all in my subconscious mind, yes, and it is technically working. I’m just struggling getting words on the page.

Anyway, I hit upon a way to take the plot forward on one of my WIPs the other day, and I now have a clean, stream-lined plot-plan that I am taking no notice of whatsoever. Hey, it's there so at least I can't get too far off track.

Part of my problem has been prioritising other things over my writing. One of the first lines in my new "Self-publish or Die" writing plan is "My writing time takes precedence, unless someone in my immediate family is dead or dying. And even then, the funeral will be at my convenience". I haven't really written that last line down, but you get the point.

After wrestling with my Muse and my schedule for the better part of a month, I finally sat myself down and just made myself write. Which was the most painful thing I have ever done. I've broken bones and dislocated joints and even they weren't as painful. But I did it. I managed to squeeze out 200 words on last year's Nano novel in just under 3 hours. Just for something to do.

And while I was forcing my fingers to type out those 200 words, a funny thing happened. My Muse thought it would be amusing to sabotage my forced creativity - by thinking about the WIP I actually wanted to work on.

I continued on with my fingers’ forced march across the keyboard, all the while not acknowledging that I could hear my Muse snickering in the background. Oh she thought she was funny, trying to distract me, but I forged on, determined not to let her get the better of me.

Until she gave me something I couldn't ignore. She gave me the answer to a plot hole the size of China - for the WIP I wanted to work on. My fingers stopped typing and my Muse cackled with laughter. She laughed so hard until I smiled and said "Thanks. I've been wondering where you've been hiding."

I opened a shiny new word document and re-wrote an entire chapter from off the top of my head, slipping in the subtle changes my Muse was pestering me with earlier. I wrote an entirely new beginning for that WIP, in the tone I had been desperately trying to portray, and I even wrote a whole new chapter that took the plot in a completely different, yet exciting, direction I never dreamed it could go.

Moral of the story - my Muse is a trickster, and if I ignore her, she does wonderful things without even trying.

What about you? How do you trick your muse?

Pick a Label, Any Label - Labelling Our Books

There's a big discussion going on over at Rachelle Gardner's blog at the moment (one of the many I currently cyber-stalk but have yet to post comment on), and it's something I have started to think about since re-working my long-term writing plan.

One of the things I have learned about self-publishing from various sources is to make sure I know my audience. It's one of the big reasons I want to re-jig my blog so that I start tailoring posts to my readers. Yeh, I'm still struggling with the concept that it's not all about me, but I'm getting there.

The post poses the question "Should We Label Christian Fiction?" and the comments section has been abuzz with arguments both for and against.

It's come about because (apparently) a few reviewers and readers have posted 1-star ratings and some not-so-nice reviews on christian books because they feel duped. For whatever reason, they didn't get the book they thought they paid for, and/or the fact that it wasn't clear from the blurb that there were christian themes.

I don't like seeing reviews like that, and I think there should be an option to give a review without a star-rating if you read a book that disappoints because of content rather than ability.

Anyway, a few comments on the post took me by surprise. A few commentors are of the opinion that it's almost an attack on their christianity if they should have to label their work as such, and they feel they'd miss out on sales, or that people would miss out on reading those books because of a label.

I tend to disagree. I'll tell you why.

I write lesbian fiction. I also write young adult fiction, some of which has, and will have, lesbian/gay themes, while others will not. I fully intend on labelling my books as lesbian, if that's what they are.

Why?

Because I want to reach the right readers. I don't want to get 1-star reviews for my work simply because a reader doesn't like the fact that my main characters are lesbian and it offends their morals or sensibilities, and I neglected to warn them in the first place. Those readers are not part of my audience.

Some writers (and I was one of them until I was shown the light) mistakenly believe that we need to get our work to the masses; to get as many people reading our prose as possible. While this is a noble dream, it's not reality.

Sure, some books will transcend genre, but I think that will only happen if the book has universal themes and only after it finds its true niche in the first place.

I think the most interesting question though is where the line is drawn. When should we consider labelling a book such as christian fiction?

I think the line is quite an easy one. If you're a christian writer, coming from a christian view-point, but the main theme of your book isn't based around faith (ie your main character has a strong faith but the overriding theme of the book is, for example, finding love that is NOT based on finding God), or you have other universal themes that resonate with readers, then it's not christian. In other words, if you stripped away the christian aspect of a character, would it make a huge difference to the way the book works?

I've read books like that, and I haven't felt duped at all. Why? Because the character had other traits that I found fascinating or could relate to.

However, if your main theme is based on faith - having it, losing it, keeping it, finding it - and without that theme your book would be a shadow of itself, then it's christian.

People like me who read books like that sometimes feel like we're being hit over the head with faith, and that annoys me. You shouldn't be worried about that because I'm not your audience. I'm not going to buy more of your books because I know I won't like them.

And there's the rub. Not everyone's going to like your book. That's not necessarily an indictment on your ability as an author, it just means that you need to work out where your book sits on the virtual bookshelf.

Give readers good information about your books, and they'll decide for themselves if they want to buy them or not. They'll thank you for it with great reviews.

Afterall, isn't it better to label your books effectively in order to find the people who will like your work, rather than take a risk on people who won't?

Sunday Sesh #19 - One Fifty Lashes Pale Ale

This Sunday's Sesh is brought to you by James Squire's One Fifty Lashes Pale Ale. I can't provide a link because on the Malt Shovel website, the pale ale hasn't been added for some reason, and on the only other site (called The Squires Bounty), there's nothing about the actual beer - just an advertisement for its launch last year.

Anyhoo, the review.

James Squire's One Fifty Lashes Pale Ale

This is another winner from the James Squire stable. It's light and a little cloudy and not much head and smell crisp and fruity. Very refreshing and easy to drink, and went down a little to quickly to be honest.
It's just a little sweet - almost shandy-ish, but not quite. Highly recommend this one.

I think the lesson here is, if its a James Squire, you won't be disappointed.

Continuing on from last week's post about goal-setting for the new year, I've downloaded and read (on my sparkly new kindle) a couple of books that I hope will assist me in building my "author platform". In other words, how to get people to like me and buy my books, and how to get THOSE people to tell OTHER people to buy my books.

It's going to be a hard slog. I'm under no illusions, however, that it will be any different from writing my books - a marathon rather than a sprint - and damn hard work.

If you're interested, the books are How I Sold a Million Books in 5 Months by John Locke, and two books by Kristen Lamb - We Are Note Alone and Are You There Blog? It's Me, Writer.

If you're at all interested in writing and particularly in self-publishing, I highly recommend all three books. John's is very similar to Kristen Lambs, but John gets you fired up and Kristen Lamb sits you back on your rear and tells you like it is.

Anyway, there will be a few changes around the blog over the next few months. As I said last week, the Sunday Sesh's will continue, and that's because I enjoy writing them. And yeh, ok, I also enjoy the beer.

They will be the only blog posts on here for the next month or so though (unless something really takes my interest), as I re-design the blog and the direction I want it to go in. I need to re-focus on my writing as well, and it all needs to start overlapping. I've started the hard slog towards defining who my readers are, and I now need to work out where they hang out after work. That's harder than I first thought, but it has also helped me to decide where to focus my efforts with regards to which of my (currently) 18 ideas I will concentrate on over the next year or two to build my audience.

Enough of my writing plans though, because I want to tell you, if you're after a fast-paced, fun and dangerously addictive read, you need to check out John Locke's Donovan Creed novels. I downloaded and read two in two days, and I am just waiting for my book budget to tick back over into the black to buy the rest of them. They are purely entertainment, so if you're after literary genius, they're not for you. And at 99c a pop for the kindle editions, what's not to like? They're also in paperback, so you don't need an e-reader to enjoy them.
Donovan Creed, Locke's main character, is a gun-for-hire and is strangely endearing, even if he does have better relationships with prostitutes than real women, and even if he is happy for people to get their come-uppance.

My pick of the two I've read so far is Wish List. Without going into too much detail, it's about a group of friends who enter their wishes onto a website, never thinking for a moment that they would start to come true. As always where Donovan Creed is concerned, there are consequences. This book had me cringing and laughing out loud. Very highly recommended.

That's enough from me this week. I have to decide what beer I'm reviewing next week, since the cupboard is bare. If you have any suggestions, I'd love to give them a go. I'm always after recommendations on what to stock my beer shelf (ok, shelves) with, so don't be shy.

Until next Sunday's Sesh,
Cheers!